10 STEPS FOR STANDING IN FAITH FOR A MATE

OR HOW TO AVOID THE DATING GAME BLUES

By Debra Brandt

Deborah’s Messianic Ministries

Introduction: A Bride for Isaac

Genesis 24: 1-27, 40,48,61-67

Genesis 24 is highly illustrative of God the Father who sends forth His Holy Spirit to win the consent of the individual soul to become the bride of His Son.

I. Trust - Delight & Commit

Psalm 37: 3 Trust in the LORD, and do good; so shalt thou dwell in the land, and verily thou shalt be fed.

4 Delight thyself also in the LORD; and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart.

5 Commit thy way unto the LORD; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass.

6 And he shall bring forth thy righteousness as the light, and thy judgment as the noonday.

7 Rest in the LORD, and wait patiently for him: fret not thyself because of him who prospereth in his way, because of the man who bringeth wicked devices to pass.

II. Write the Vision Down

What are you believing God for, what is the desire of your heart? Be realistic, pray and trust God for

His best for you. Example above, the Bride for Isaac.

Habakuk 2:2-3 And the LORD answered me, and said, Write the vision, and make it plain upon tables, that he may run that readeth it.

3 For the vision is yet for an appointed time, but at the end it shall speak, and not lie: though it tarry, wait for it; because it will surely come, it will not tarry.

Begin interceeding for your mate now, and do not stop after your married!

III. Keep your lives Holy and Pure Before God & Man

Your past is under the Blood - You are Holy and Pure in Gods eyes -

1 Peter 1:15, Eph. 1:4

1 Timothy 4:12 Let no man despise thy youth; but be thou an example of the believers, in word, in conversation, in charity, in spirit, in faith, in purity.

IV. We Walk by Faith and not by sight

Are you believing your circumstances or what statistics say, or are you

believing the Word?

Hebrews 11:1 Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.

V. No Missionary Dating

God has never called a single person to become a missionary dating

service. Do not date unsaved people! You can witness to them, invite them

to Church or Bible Study, but do not get yourself involved by dating an unsaved person - dating or marriage. God said it! so obey.

11 Cor. 6:14 Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?

15 And what concord hath Christ with Belial? or what part hath he that believeth with an infidel?

16 And what agreement hath the temple of God with idols? for ye are the temple of the living God; as God hath said, I will dwell in them, and walk in them; and I will be their God, and they shall be my people.

17 Wherefore come out from among them, and be ye separate, saith the Lord, and touch not the unclean thing; and I will receive you,

VI. Know Who You are In Christ

You need to renew your mind with the Word of God to see yourself

as Christ sees you. Especially if you have come from any kind of

abusive relationship, whether it be family or an ex -spouse.

I recommend 2 books by T.D. Jakes- for the Woman “Woman Thou art Loosed” and for the men “Loose that Man and let Him Go”

(see handout for In Christ Scriptures)

VII. Develop the fruit of the Spirit in your life

Walk in the Spirit, take spiritual inventory of your life and make adjustments

now, not later. Read Galatians 5:16-26 You need to not just be looking

for the right person, but you must also become the right person.

16 This I say then, Walk in the Spirit, and ye shall not fulfil the lust of the flesh.

17 For the flesh lusteth against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh: and these are contrary the one to the other: so that ye cannot do the things that ye would.

18 But if ye be led of the Spirit, ye are not under the law.

19 Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these; Adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness,

20 Idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, variance, emulations, wrath, strife, seditions, heresies,

21 Envyings, murders, drunkenness, revellings, and such like: of the which I tell you before, as I have also told you in time past, that they which do such things shall not inherit the kingdom of God.

22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,

23 Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.

24 And they that are Christ's have crucified the flesh with the affections and lusts.

25 If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit.

26 Let us not be desirous of vain glory, provoking one another, envying one another

VIII. Seek first the Kingdom of God and His Righteousness -

Pray! Pray! Pray! And stay in the Word

Marie Hudson Taylor (her husband, Hudson Taylor was a missionary to China) Told him when they were courting “If you love me more then you love Jesus then you are not worthy of me”

If Jesus is not #1 in your life or your future mates life, then your heading

for trouble. The Key to a successful marriage is to be sure that Jesus

stays the Lord of your life and Lord of your marriage.

Matt. 6: 27 Which of you by taking thought can add one cubit unto his stature?

28 And why take ye thought for raiment? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow; they toil not, neither do they spin:

29 And yet I say unto you, That even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these.

30 Wherefore, if God so clothe the grass of the field, which to day is, and to morrow is cast into the oven, shall he not much more clothe you, O ye of little faith?

31 Therefore take no thought, saying, What shall we eat? or, What shall we drink? or, Wherewithal shall we be clothed?

32 (For after all these things do the Gentiles seek:) for your heavenly Father knoweth that ye have need of all these things.

33 But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you

IX. You can claim a Mate but cannot claim a specific person

God will never override another persons will - You can not pick

a certain person for your husband/wife, they have something to

say about it also.

Mark 11:22 And Jesus answering saith unto them, Have faith in God.

23 For verily I say unto you, That whosoever shall say unto this mountain, Be thou removed, and be thou cast into the sea; and shall not doubt in his heart, but shall believe that those things which he saith shall come to pass; he shall have whatsoever he saith.

24 Therefore I say unto you, What things soever ye desire, when ye pray, believe that ye receive them, and ye shall have them.

25 And when ye stand praying, forgive, if ye have ought against any: that your Father also which is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses.

26 But if ye do not forgive, neither will your Father which is in heaven forgive your trespasses.

1 Peter 5:7 Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you.

X. Walk in Love and Forgiveness - Love never fails, and faith works by love

Do not allow unforgiveness and strife rob you of Gods blessings.

11 Cor. 12:9 And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.

1 Cor 13: 4 Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous, it does not brag, and it is not proud.

5 Love is not rude, is not selfish, and does not get upset with others. Love does not count up wrongs that have been done.

6 Love is not happy with evil but is happy with the truth.

7 Love patiently accepts all things. It always trusts, always hopes, and always remains strong.

8 Love never ends. There are gifts of prophecy, but they will be ended. There are gifts of speaking in different languages, but those gifts will stop. There is the gift of knowledge, but it will come to an end.

9 The reason is that our knowledge and our ability to prophesy are not perfect.

10 But when perfection comes, the things that are not perfect will end.

11 When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I stopped those childish ways.

12 It is the same with us. Now we see a dim reflection, as if we were looking into a mirror, but then we shall see clearly. Now I know only a part, but then I will know fully, as God has known me.

13 So these three things continue forever: faith, hope, and love. And the greatest of these is love.

Be content where you are now in Yeshua/Jesus, wanting a Christian mate is a good thing, but you need to keep God first place in your life and make sure that person you are thinking of marrying also has God first place in their life.

Marriage takes work, even the best Christian marriages have to overcome obstacles and problems, divorce is not an option when you get married (with the exception of adultery or abuse) you need to make that commitment that you will keep this covenant and do what ever it takes to bring glory to God in your marriage.

Walking in love and forgiveness is a big key to a successful marriage. Get pastoral counseling if you are thinking of getting married, better to find out before your married that the person is not for you, then after you are married.

Instead of looking for the right person, let God bring that person to you, and you work on becoming the right person in Gods eyes.

Scriptures to pray for your mate

Copyright 2001 Debra E. Brandt